August 2017 Fire Eaters Meeting

FIRE EATERS, FRIENDS, LADIES, ASSOCIATES, GUESTS, PROSPECTIVE MEMBERS, LEND ME YOUR EARS, or possibly your wallets, purses, money bags.  Anyway, pay attention to this fantastic announcement all ye who await a transcendental experience and be advised of what you can anticipate upon your participation in this unique performance never allowed to be provided in the United States until now, through the diligent efforts of your 1st Lt. Commander.
EVERYONE BE HAPPY.  There is joy all around at the prospect of a rousing Fire Eater meeting this coming Wednesday, August, 2, 2017 at Bass Pro Shops near Ashland on Lakeridge Parkway.
Joy, happiness, excitement, ecstatic passion, cheerfulness, rapture, gladness, bliss and pleasures beyond anyone’s imagination await all who attend the upcoming Fire Eater meeting on August 2.
I’m so happy that all is well and there is joy exceeding all expectations for all Members, Friends, Ladies, Associates, Visitors, Guests and Prospective Members to be a part of this felicitous occasion brought to you with little fanfare other than this message.  DO NOT DISCLOSE THE CONTENTS OF THIS
MESSAGE TO THE VIRGINIA GOVERNOR, LT GOVERNOR OR ATTORNEY GENERAL to protect the sanctity of our proceedings, and particularly this month’s event filled meeting.
All is well and we are excited to bring this festive evening for your enjoyment and delight.
After the World Famous Happy Dance to be performed by a Compatriot, whose identity will not be revealed, to protect the guilty, all attendees are invited to participate in individual Happy Dances of their own, which shall be judged by the Commander, whose decision is final.  Then it is on to the Conga Line Dance throughout the Bass Pro Shops continuing until 9:00 p.m., with liquid refreshments, including adult beverages available in the parking lot for a nominal fee.
Your happiness, joy, cheerfulness and delight are our only desire.
WELL, ON THE OTHER HAND, maybe we can squeeze in a brief presentation by our Keynote Speaker for the evening, Bob Krick, who will speak to us about the Generals involved in the Defense of Richmond.  His presentation involves a lot of local history around Hanover County, so we may need to shorten the Conga Line.
ACTUALLY FOLKS, here is the Real Deal:  Meet at the Bass Pro Shops between 5:00 p.m. and 6:00 p.m. to enjoy good fellowship and a meal in the Restaurant.  Then on to the Business Meeting and Keynote Speaker upstairs in the meeting room at 7:00 p.m.
Bring your friends, neighbors and family members to this August 2, 2017 meeting of the Edmund Ruffin Fire Eaters at Bass Pro Shops.
Bring your happiness, your joy, your excitement, and you will not be disappointed.
All is well, all is peace, all is tranquility.  And all hell will break loose on August 2 with passion, rapture and bliss, to mention a few of the benefits of attending this special meeting.  BE THERE.
End of Report.
Joe Howard